my mother as she reached within the folds of her coat and retrieved a knife.
The sight of it glinting in the moonlight made me close my eyes, but I did as she’d asked, did as she’d begged—I made no move to stop her.
“Mother, in the light of the moon, I gift you my blood. I return my powers to you, and I present my son. He seeks a mate, an omega, one who will help the children of the Highbanks pack flourish for another five centuries. I gift you all that I am, all that I have been and could ever be, and hope you honor my sacrifice and gift my child the mate he needs to reign over his people.”
Raising a hand to cover my eyes, I heard her gasp and knew she’d sliced into her flesh. I could scent the blood spilling from her, hear the horrendous gurgles as she made the sacrifice on my behalf.
As the blood coated the foot of the totem, a wind whipped from out of nowhere. The howling sound whispered throughout the rows of the council, and I felt myself being caught up in its gust. It wasn’t strong enough to knock me off my feet, but was powerful enough for me to feel its lash against my skin.
I counted down, waiting for the wind to drop, and when it finally did, I ran toward my mother, who had crumpled against the totem. She fell to her knees, the bones colliding with the shiny pedestal with a cracking noise that made me wince on her behalf. As she slumped against the carved wolf I remembered stroking as a child during my first rite, I leaped forward and dragged her against me.
Tears wet my eyes, blurring my vision as I stared down at her, looked at her beloved face as she smiled at me. Smiled. I shuddered, missing her already as she bled out in my arms.
“He’s there, Eli,” she whispered. “Waiting on me. Oh, Mother, how I missed him.”
“Go to him, Mom,” I whispered back, holding her tighter in my grasp. “Be free and be happy.”
My cheeks were hot with trailing tears, and when she stiffened, I felt like howling out my rage and grief.
How long I rocked her, I couldn’t say, but when I heard my council shuffling around, when I was torn from the fog of my loss, I sought control, for an alpha couldn’t act without it, and carefully, with the utmost respect and all the love I felt for her, I placed her body back on the pedestal.
It was ruby red and glinting with her blood, but as I shuffled her limp form onto it, I waited for the Mother to accept her into her embrace.
When light flared at the tip of the totem, I braced myself for what was about to happen. I’d read the same tomes my mother had, knew of this only because of what she’d shown me. The totem wasn’t used for this anymore, wasn’t supposed to—
A gasp shot up around the council at my back as the totem burst into flames. It burned hotly, enough to sear my skin and melt it, but I didn’t fret. This was how it was supposed to be.
As wrong as it was, this was right.
My mother’s body was caught in the flames, and I watched her burn for a second before I could take no more and closed my eyes.
The scent revolted me—burning fat and roasting flesh. How I didn’t vomit, I’d never know, but when the wind whipped into being once more and the heat from the fire disappeared, I looked upon the totem.
She was no longer there. Not even the dust of her remains was left behind. And the totem? The fire was no more, but the wood was charred black, rich and gleaming with red hot embers. As though my mother’s death, the fire, had breathed new life into it.
Maybe it had, like vineyard owners set fire to vines every season to replenish the soil for the next year. All I knew was that the sacrifice was too great and my loss too huge for me to appreciate it.
Unable to take another moment of this pain, I shifted, turning into the baser creature who could mourn but whose nature was earthier.
The second I shifted, I howled my grief, the melancholic sound reverberating around the clearing. In response to my shift, the totem turbocharged my power, forcing the council to transform too.