Pushing Up Posies (Grim Dating #1) - Eve Langlais Page 0,3

And making such a sacrifice. He must be pretty special.” Muriel clasped her hands.

“I am dying to see what’s under that armor of his.” Bambi fanned herself.

Lucifer’s stomach heaved. “Can we stop with this mushy shit? I am going to barf.”

“Is this a bad time to say I love you, Daddy?” Muriel batted her lashes.

“What is wrong with you, saying that kind of crap?” He shook his finger at her, and overhead, thunder cracked. He’d been having more lapses lately. Too much stress. Not enough sex.

And given the very pregnant Gaia gave him the stink eye every time he glanced in her direction, that drought wouldn’t end any time soon.

“You’re the best father a girl could ask for. And an awesome granddaddy, too.” Muriel just kept going. The compliments over the top and turning into a mockery he could handle better than the emotional shit.

He snorted. “One day, I’m going to kill you for that insolence.” He’d be sad when that day came.

“Only if I don’t kill you first, Daddy,” Muriel sang, and winked.

Muri had no idea she wasn’t the one he needed to worry about. The enemy that would truly challenge him had yet to be born…but it wouldn’t be long now. He had to prepare.

“Stop jibbering and jabbering. We are in a crisis, my daughters. A threat like you cannot imagine.” He flung an arm and wished he’d worn his cape. It would have added the necessary dramatic effect. At least the rest of him appeared regal. His black Hessian boots—taken from the body of a soldier on a battlefield before the blood had cooled—shone. His breeches were tucked into the tops of them and molded his firm thighs. Firmer than they’d been in centuries given the amount of nights he’d paced, bouncing his baby boy who wouldn’t sleep unless his daddy walked him. A child with the shittiest timing.

One second the kid was asleep in his crib, snoring through the damned monitor Gaia insisted they keep in the bedroom, but the moment Lucifer fondled his wife…

“Wah!”

And guess who got to get up since Gaia was hugely pregnant? It was his own fault, as she reminded him on a daily basis.

Even his dreams weren’t safe from his cock-blocking son. Fall into a nice dream where he was chasing wenches? The crying was usually accompanied by the smelliest diaper. And could he snap his fingers and clean up the mess?

Oh no, Gaia insisted they care for the child themselves. Like mere servants. No wonder people had lost respect for the lord of hell. A glorified nursemaid.

“Slow down there, Daddy. You’re going to wear a hole in the floor you’re pacing so hard. Calm your nerves and take slow, deep breaths.”

He paused and glared. “Are you placating me?”

“Mocking, actually.” Muriel winked.

Apparently having a harem of men didn’t curb her of disrespect. Perhaps he should send more discipline videos for her husbands to study. He had recorded an entire collection.

“I will gladly kill you when the time comes, but today is not that day. Take a look at this.” He swept his hand at the recreation of Hell, a diorama painstakingly created by a team of building block engineers. The detail was incredible.

“Playing with toys again?” Muriel teased, but she did stand closer to it.

Bambi slinked over to the table with the demolished blocks tumbled all over. “What happened here?” She ran a finger through the rubble.

How to explain that while he’d been plotting the demise of the mortal plane Junior had crawled over and demanded Lucifer pick him up. The baby, though, didn’t want his father’s arms but the contents of the table. Watching Junior trample the world, crushing the human armies and waving his arms as he exclaimed, “Bow, peasants!” had Lucifer beaming in pride.

No point in letting the lad know that it most likely would not be him eventually leading the armies of darkness. The boy wouldn’t be seasoned enough. But Muri and her husband generals would be just right. Maybe he wouldn’t kill any of them yet. The prophecy did say something about the lamb arriving with her ten herders. Yet there was also the prediction in the ancient sea scroll he’d stolen that didn’t mention him with any of his daughters by his side.

He’d not told anyone about the prophecies he’d been collecting. Some secrets were for the devil alone.

“Ignore the broken blocks. That tableau isn’t important. I need you to look at this rendition of Hell. More specifically, the fourth ring.” The soldiers’ ring. Where