A Purr-fect Storm Cozy Mystery - Addison Moore Page 0,4
top made of pretty blue scales that looks as if it’s magically adhered to her body. He nods to the brunette next to her. “And this is Madge the Badge.” He turns his head to the other surly beauties. “And on this side we’ve got Wendy City Destruction, and Leave ’em Moaning Simone.”
Wendy City Destruction is dressed like a construction worker who’s had a bad day. Her construction boots are thick and chunky, and I can’t help but notice they’re a pair of tan Timberlands. I used to have a pair back in Jersey, and boy, did I ever love those.
And Leave ‘em Moaning Simone is wearing a shiny silver bathing suit with a sequin scarf around her neck.
“Cool!” Tilly says as she and Stephanie bop over. “I want a fun wrestling name.”
“You’ve got one,” Stephanie doesn’t hesitate in letting her know it. “It’s Tease ‘em and Leave ‘em Teasdale. And I’m Love ‘em and Leave ‘em Lola.” She gives a hard wink to the strapping man before us. “I’m hocking cookies until this shindig is over, but see me later and maybe I’ll let you see my cookies.”
Good grief. At least she’s subtle.
“I’m Bowie Binx,” I say to the girls before us. “And this is my boyfriend, Shepherd Wexler.”
Boyfriend. As much as I love to say it—with this ornery yet beautiful crowd, I felt it was best to delineate the boy boundaries right out the gate.
Leave ‘em Moaning Simone gasps over at Shep. “Say, you’re not related to S.J. Wexler, are you? He’s my favorite author, and I hear he hails from these parts.”
“That would be me.” Shep sheds a dark smile that could melt the clothes right off every woman in the room.
It’s true. Shep is sort of a big deal author who happens to pen books about the mob.
Fun fact: Before we met, he used my family as a model for his books. Another far less fun fact: Both of our fathers are serving time at the same men’s correctional facility for entirely different crimes. My dad squealed on the “family”, and his dad slaughtered his second wife. Some people have a favorite movie in common, we have crime.
“So crazy cool!” the woman roars over at him, and for the briefest of seconds, I could have sworn Shep was reaching for his gun. Shep happens to be a part-time detective down at the homicide division in Woodley, too.
Yeah, he’s that hot.
Although I’m still not sure if he’s smart or foolish to be with me. I could cost him everything, including that fun little activity he partakes in hundreds of times a day called breathing.
Frisk shakes his head. “I knew you’d make your mark in this world.”
Shep’s chest bounces. “And I knew you’d leave yours.”
The four women ensconcing him exchange a brief glance.
I lean in. “So what brings you all out to Starry Falls?”
Frisk ticks his head back. “I had a little legal tussle that needed to be straightened out, and I thought why not bring a few of the girls on the road with me? Simone and Wendy are both from Scooter Springs. Mallory is from Leeds, and Meg lives about an hour away.”
The brunette to his right with the black hair and pale blue eyes nods. “I’m not a part of the circuit anymore. I’ve pretty much settled in Vermont.”
“That’s right,” Frisk says. “Meg here is working two jobs these days. She’s slinging hash at a place called the Honey Pot Diner and teaching the girls down at Red Satin Gentlemen’s Club their spicy moves—all of which I taught her.” He bellows out a hearty laugh.
Meg shrugs. “Let’s just say, now that I’m there, the girls are getting twice as much in tips as they did before.”
“You deserve a cookie,” Stephanie says, quickly producing a platter of anisette yummy goodness. “Bowie swiped the recipe from our Nana Rose. She used to tell us the more we ate, the bigger our boobs would be.” She makes a face at Shep. “As it turns out, results may vary, but on the up side—or should I say the back side—people are ponying up good money to get implants to make their bottoms look like Bowie’s.”
“You’re not funny,” I tell her.
“I’m a little bit funny,” she says as everyone in our midst takes a bite of those cookies and moans.
“Wow.” Meg looks fit to beat us both up until we hand over the recipe. “My sister owns and runs the Cutie Pie Bakery and Cakery down in Honey Hollow. She