Nothing But Cowboy (The Raffertys of Last Stand #1) - Justine Davis Page 0,3
delicate but strong in that uniquely feminine way that could outlast the strength of any man, given the motivation. He had no doubt of that, not when he’d had this woman as an example all his life.
She spoke quietly. “Maybe we should just confront it and ask him what he wants. And—” she squeezed his fingers “—if I haven’t said so lately, I’m very proud of you, for taking on that poor boy.”
His mouth twisted wryly. “Moment of weakness.”
“Moment of compassion.”
“Maybe.” He let out an audible breath. “I sure never saw myself as a foster parent.”
“I know. That reminds me, I saw Lark Leclair in town this morning. She asked how things were going.”
“Could be better, could be worse.”
“About all you can ask for in life, isn’t it?” He smiled at that. “Why don’t you call her, find out if she has any advice on what to do?”
The woman who had walked him through getting custody of Lucas as a foster parent—to the point of calling on his old classmate and now police chief Shane Highwater to vouch for him—had spent several years working with Child Protective Services, and had likely encountered situations like Lucas’s more than she cared to remember. So he would take Mom’s advice and call her. Besides, he wanted to talk to her anyway about the next steps if he was going to proceed with the adoption.
“I will.”
“And by the way, she was sporting an engagement ring. Kane obviously popped the question.”
“Well that’s hardly a surprise,” he said with a grin.
“He’s come a long way. It’s quite admirable.” She sighed. “That’s the last of the Highwaters married or engaged now.”
He gave his mother a wary look. “That was a bit pointed.”
“I want my boys happy. So sue me.”
“We are happy.”
“Content, maybe. Cody and his gadgets, Rylan and his craft, Chance and his dogs, you running the ranch—”
“Ha. Everybody knows you run this place and I just dance to your tune. Even Lucas knows it.”
She blinked. “Lucas?”
“He told me you were the boss.” He smiled at her then, this indomitable woman. “He said just today that the first time you gave him an order, he felt like he belonged.”
The smile she gave him in return at that made him very glad he’d shared that moment. But then, when her gaze narrowed, he knew he hadn’t escaped. “That’s lovely. Thank you for telling me that. But quit trying to divert me. As I was saying, you boys are content, but there’s a difference between content and truly happy.”
He never knew what to say when she got on this particular horse, so as usual he clammed up and said nothing. He’d tried for that romantic gold ring once, and it had been a disaster. And only at the end had he realized Anna, his ex, had expected him to tire of ranch life and come back with her to the city, just as he had expected she would grow to love ranch life and stay here with him. Neither was going to happen, and so that gold ring got melted into a shapeless nugget he kept on his dresser as a reminder to believe what people did, not what they said. And over time he’d settled into simply not letting what anybody outside the family or his closest friends said or did matter at all, at least not in a personal way. And it worked.
He was, as his mother said, content.
Happy, he told himself, was overrated.
Chapter Two
“Can I ask you something?”
Keller glanced up from the fence post he was settling in place. Lucas wasn’t looking at him but was staring at the board he was holding as if he was afraid it might escape.
“I thought we settled you can always ask,” he said.
“Yeah, but this isn’t about chores or the ranch or anything like that.”
Keller went very still. Something in the kid’s voice told him this was…important. Meaningful. At least he thought that’s what his gut was telling him. “Ask,” he said.
“After your dad was killed…did you ever want to run away?”
Damn. Important? Only the most important thing of all.
“I did. More than anything.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Because I learned there’s no running away from that kind of pain. It’s inside you, and you carry it with you.”
Lucas looked up then. And Keller realized he’d probably been avoiding looking at him because his eyes were a bit too shiny, like he’d been fighting tears. He’d been there, too. Wanting to be the man of the family at seventeen, but sometimes unable