Merciless Sinner (What Alex Wants #1) - E.M. Gayle Page 0,3

of my head. I was not into repeating my old mistakes anymore. The point of growing up was to move forward not backward.

“Well, whoever this is from, he somehow knew just the perfect gift to send. That visit got your head thinking about that party from college didn’t it?”

I ignored Zia’s insight into my mind and hastily rewrapped the paper around the crop and shut the lid on the box. “It doesn’t matter, I’m not going.”

“What? Oh yes you are. You’ve talked almost non-stop about that club for the past week. You aren’t seeing anyone. Haven’t seen anyone as long as I’ve known you, in fact. Plus the kitchen will be closed by six tonight. Seriously, you have no excuse.”

“How about the fact I don’t have the first clue who this guy is? He could be a freak for all I know. Or dangerous. I’m not that young or stupid anymore.”

Zia rolled her eyes. “Give me a break. The Kat club is the most exclusive in Manhattan and you have to be nearly as rich as God to even belong there. Not to mention the strict rules.”

“Money doesn’t mean you’re sane and that kind of control isn’t something to be trifled with.” I tried not to burst into tears despite the need clawing inside me. That visit had touched something buried deep. A place I didn’t think I should open again because it hurt too much when it went unfulfilled.

“Harper, listen to yourself. You have an excuse for everything.” Zia held up her hand to stop me from objecting. “Uh huh. Not this time, doll. You’re my best friend and as said best friend it’s my duty to make sure you don’t wallow in your pathetic non-existent love life for another day. You’re going to go home early, change into that beautiful red dress I gave you for Christmas, which you have yet to wear so don’t think I didn’t notice, and you’re going to meet this mystery man right on time as instructed.”

“It’s a terrible idea. What if it’s not safe?” I almost had to hold back my bark of laughter over that one. Safety was an illusion. I’d married it once. And that had turned into the worst kind of disaster. I should have learned after that experience that safe was too overrated for me.

That didn’t make me brave, but hopefully it made me smarter.

These days I ventured out of my new comfort zone in business, not in my personal life. I ran a successful kitchen for Zia and recently added private catering to my repertoire. Taking on that venture in this city felt like more than enough risk in my life. Which meant taking on more risk for something like sex seemed almost trivial at this point.

“It’s a club with a stringent reputation. You won’t exactly be alone. They have cameras all over that place.”

“Yeah, that’s a problem too. What if someone I know sees me?”

“Seriously? Who cares? No one. That’s who. Plus, you know darn well you can leave at any time. No one’s going to lock you up and throw away the key.”

I had my doubts about anyone watching me too closely. It had been a long time since I’d run, but I couldn’t afford to be complacent. Could I?

“But I—”

“Nope.” Zia shook her head. “No more excuses. You’ve been in denial for far too long. And while I’m thrilled you got your head out of your ass over that husband of yours, you aren’t faring much better as a single woman. You’ve got needs. Hell, we all do. No one’s asking you to settle down and have babies for Christ’s sake. It’s a date and hopefully some damned good sex. When was the last time you had that?”

I wasn’t going to answer that. The truth would only feed Zia’s little plan for me she had going in her head. Pretty soon she’d probably start calling it Operation Get Harper Laid. That thought made me groan.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. So stop making excuses. In fact… I have an idea.”

Uh oh. Zia with an idea was a surefire recipe for trouble. The last time she’d had one of those, I’d ended up walking rescue dogs in the park, which was supposed to be a great way to get men to talk to me and only ended up with me picking up dog crap the size of my arm from the monsters she called dogs that really looked like small horses. No thanks.

“I dare you, Harper.