Between Now and Heartbreak - Dylan Allen Page 0,1

an apologetic smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. In fact, I can tell she’s annoyed I asked.

Since I’ve been back home, she’s gone back to the distant role she played in my life before everything.

When I replay our visit at my grandmothers I can see things I missed in the moment. Yes, she set up the scheme that led to me being able to come home. I might still be there if she hadn’t. But, I can see now that her concern was laced with cunning.

If that day wasn’t so clear in my memories I’d be easily convinced that I’d imagined that. Because now, she’s back to being my father’s docile, obedient wife. There is no hint of the woman who came to ask me to help her undermine his grasp on her daughter.

I drop a kiss goodnight on her downy little brow and inhale her sweet baby smell.

Fiona’s not subtle throat clearing is my cue to pull away.

I make my way back to the kitchen to wait for Dina.

All of this is my fault. I’ve let my guard down since I came home.

Duke, until his recently, has been on his best behavior. He made good on all his promises. Besides his insistence that I wear a pink something every day, he hasn’t said a word about my wardrobe.

He flew in some hairstylist from Los Angeles to make a custom wig for me to wear until my hair is long enough to dye and put extensions in.

As much as I don’t like being blonde, I have to admit that it’s amazing. Unlike the one I ordered for myself from amazon It actually fits and looks like it’s growing out of my head.

When he was brought in as acting CEO, he got a huge salary increase and he’s been really generous with it. Especially when it comes to me.

Nothing but the finest will do.

And he doesn’t skimp on himself either. Duke looks every bit the young, powerful leader that he plays every day at Wolfe.

We went on our first public date less than a month after I got home and he took me to a really fancy restaurant in Austin where a very high profile blogger also happened to be having dinner.

Our picture was in the paper the next morning and suddenly, we were off to the races.

I had invitations to parties every weekend. I was asked to join the Junior League and two girls who used to call me Scar Face in elementary school, Georgia and Eva, are suddenly my every day #lunchbuddies, my #workoutbuddies, and my #spadaybesties. And all the other hashtags they’ve come up with to chronicle every single second of our time together.

At first, I didn’t hate it…In fact, it felt nice to not have to be on the defensive all the time. Being treated like I belonged didn’t suck. The feeling started to grow on me.

Duke, however…has done the exact opposite.

On my first day in my new position at Wolfe, he sent flowers. Not a huge bouquet, but a little posy that looked handpicked but was too expensively arranged to be. And he’s sent one every day since.

And while I haven’t cooed and swooned the way my co-workers have when those little bouquets arrive, there have been a few days where I’ve …swayed a little.

He’s still a greedy, overly confident douche with a shit eating grin and more ambition than sense. But he’s also turned out to be the perfect gentleman and when we’re alone, he hasn’t tried anything that makes me uncomfortable.

That doesn’t mean he hasn’t made it very clear that he wants things to be more than just transactional. And, I have moments, usually right before my period starts, where I wonder if I shouldn’t just use him to scratch my itch.

To date, I’ve never done more than wonder.

Sure, I can get caught up in the attention, the flattery, the access that looking like this has brought me.

I’m not apologetic about the fact that I like blending into the tableau instead of ruining it.

But, swayed is not fooled.

Forgiven is not forgotten.

Duke didn’t wake up and suddenly realize what a great catch I was and decide to make the most of this arrangement.

This money means a great deal to Duke. Publicly, everyone thinks he’s golden. The youngest son trying to find his way still. But, that’s because his father is very good at cleaning up his messes.

For all Duke’s ambition, he doesn’t like hard work. And since there is no such thing as success