it. It seemed so big back then, but, as I got older, I guess I realised it wasn’t.
After what happened the last time we were all on Galanikos, I never thought we’d go back. I was thirty-three by the time of this holiday and so much had happened in those nine years.
It was probably the familiarity of that airport that brought it all back for Mum. We’d visited the island so many times when I was growing up – and then, after everything with Alan, we stopped.
Mum goes: ‘It’s nice to all be together as a family.’ I suppose I’d not thought of the holiday like that until she said it. It’s probably because family has never meant as much to me as it did to her.
I know that sounds bad. People will probably hate me for it – but I can’t pretend to be someone I’m not. Mum loved her kids and grandkids. She enjoyed having everyone around her – but I was always happier when it was just me and her. Or, when he was in a good mood, when it was just me and Dad.
Mum once told me that she’d always wanted a huge family, five or six kids. I asked her why she’d only had two, but she never really answered. I think it was probably Dad…
Then, later, she didn’t say it, but I know she’d have loved more grandkids. She adored Chloe and Amy, and she completely doted on them. She never said it out loud because that wasn’t her way, but I know she’d have wanted me to try for children again. I think… um…
… Sorry, can you stop the recording? I need a minute.
Julius: Mum couldn’t wait to be on holiday with the girls. She’d spent weeks telling them about the hotel, the pool and the slides. They were more excited about the all-you-can-eat buffet. Mum had told them there was unlimited ice cream and they couldn’t believe it.
Emma: I didn’t know how to reply to her. I don’t know if she expected a response, or if she was just talking. I was thinking that I shouldn’t have come, that the last thing I wanted was for everyone to be together again as a family.
I didn’t tell anyone this at the time, but I deliberately chose a seat on the plane that was a few rows away from everyone else. When we all compared boarding cards, I shrugged and said it must have just worked out like that – but, really, I didn’t want to be with everyone else. I couldn’t stand it. I was embarrassed, if you want the truth. We used to have family get-togethers all the time – and then we didn’t. It was my fault, obviously – and everyone knew it.
After all, we could hardly have had a big Sunday meal together while I was in prison.
Chapter Two
THE BRAVE BOY
Emma: There was a big dinner on the first night at the hotel. It was Mum’s idea, so I couldn’t really say no. We were right in the middle of the restaurant, with all ten of us around this one table. I was last one down, so didn’t get a choice about where to sit. The twins were at one end with Julius, while I was at the other. I had Dad on one side, Daniel on the other, and Mum opposite.
Julius: I dodged a bullet on that first night. No way was I getting stuck next to Dad and Daniel when they started knocking back the wine.
Emma: Daniel was telling this really long and really boring story about a skiing trip where he dislocated his shoulder. It was the type of thing you think might never end. You could circumnavigate the globe in a rubber dinghy, come back to the hotel and he’d still be banging on about it.
He was making it sound like he’d been on the beaches at Normandy, but the essence was that he’d ignored a bunch of signs, skied into a rock and fallen on his massive arse.
Daniel: Ah, the skiing trip! Did I tell you about how I dislocated my shoulder? We’d just left my villa and it was my sixth run of the day. I was on my best form until I dislocated my shoulder. Still managed to finish, mind. It was this Swiss guy’s fault for not looking where he was going. I probably should’ve sued him, but it wasn’t worth it in the end.