Until Alex - J. Nathan Page 0,3

pain in my life like I needed the proverbial hole in the head. Actually, a hole in the head would’ve been nothing compared to the hell I’d been through.

I swiped at my tears.

It didn’t shock me that they hadn’t stopped. I’d more or less been gutted. Stripped of everything in my life. Everything I’d ever known. Everything I’d ever loved.

My life was a complete mess. I was a complete mess.

Footsteps crunched over the dry grass.

My head shot up. My watery eyes, swollen from weeks of sobbing, squinted up at the shadowed figure before me. With the sun blaring directly behind the person, I could only distinguish a large build and towering height.

“You okay?” a deep voice asked.

I hadn’t even spoken to my aunt about what happened in Austin, so I had no intention of sharing my sob story with a stranger I couldn’t even see. “Not really.”

I assumed he got his answer. Completed his good deed for the day. Paid it forward. Because he stepped away, leaving the sun shining in my eyes. But instead of walking away, the wood creaked under his weight as he sat down beside me.

Alrighty, then.

I rubbed my palms into my eyes, knowing the attempt to clear the tears would be futile. But really? What did I have left to lose?

I chanced a peek. But my blurry eyes, and the way the stranger stared down at the strategically placed rips in the knees of his faded jeans, hindered me from seeing his face. His body was lean, and he loomed over me by almost a head. His messy dark hair resembled that of the guys at my old school. Like he’d rolled out of bed and didn’t care how he looked trudging across campus.

Long moments slipped by. Neither of us spoke.

I watched as he twisted and knotted his hands together like his life depended on it. He sported some serious muscles under the white T-shirt that clung to his impressive arms. He didn’t look much older than me, twenty-one. Maybe twenty-two.

Despite his presence, my tears continued to drop as the silent minutes stretched on. My soft sniffles became lost in both the melody of chirping birds in nearby trees and the stranger’s even breathing. I’d been surrounded by so much heartache over the past month that the in-and-out whoosh of his steady breaths soothed me. Cleared my mind. Gave me something new to focus on.

I wondered what he thought. What ran through his head as he sat beside a strange girl with a constant stream of tears flowing from—

A disbelieving laugh burst from my lips.

He glanced over. Oh my. His icy blue eyes, enclosed by gorgeous dark lashes, locked onto mine. Though they were confused and contemplative, they took my breath away. Was that even possible after everything I’d endured?

I flashed a half grin. The best I could manage under the circumstances that brought me to this town. “You must be some kind of miracle worker.”

His eyes narrowed.

I rubbed away the remaining tears from my cheeks as another incredulous laugh slipped out. “I haven’t been able to stop crying for days.”

He nodded. “Four days.” His pretty eyes flashed back to his jeans as if he’d said too much.

I didn’t bother to mention my crying had lasted for almost a month. Instead, I shook off the unsettling thought and drew in a deep cleansing breath, actually feeling my lungs expand. “But then you sat down, and poof. They all but disappeared.”

He made no attempt to respond. His eyes stayed lowered.

Had I made him uncomfortable? Had my honesty embarrassed him?

I stared down at his twisting fingers, his short clean nails, his knuckles covered with faded bruises and crisscrossed scars. Did he play sports? Work manual labor? Both?

Without even thinking, I placed my hand on his bare forearm. Good Lord. It was hard as a rock. “Thank you.”

His arm stiffened. His eyes shot to my fingers wrapped around it.

I’d crossed some invisible boundary line. But what could I do? To remove my hand at that point would’ve made it even more awkward.

His eyes lifted to mine for a brief moment. And though it was brief, I caught the regret that flashed in them. It wasn’t regret for me. More like regret he sat down next to me. Regret he crossed my path.

Without a word, he hopped to his feet.

My hand dropped unceremoniously to my side as I watched him tear off toward the building. When he reached the door, I expected him to turn around. To say something.