Rules of a Rebel and a Shy Girl - Jessica Sorensen Page 0,1
me that it wasn’t her fault. She said she found out her boyfriend was cheating on her and her friends talked her into going to Vegas to ease her broken heart. I felt bad for her, remembering how my dad had broken her heart, so I told her I was fine, that I knew how to take care of myself, which was true. I had been doing it for years.
She seemed relieved by my words and, after that, started staying out more. I was left wishing I never felt sorry for her to begin with.
“Willow, please just open the door, or I’m going to pick the lock. Then I’ll be upset, and I hate getting upset with you.” Her voice is calm but firm, carrying a warning.
Sucking in a breath, I scoot away from the headboard and slide to the edge of the bed. The linoleum floor is ice cold against my bare feet as I stand up and walk to the door, probably because my mom turned down the heat to save money.
“Is Bill out there?” I ask quietly as I reach the door.
“No, he went to my room,” she says. “But he might come out soon, so hurry up.”
My fingers tremble as I place my hand on the doorknob and crack open the door.
My mom immediately shoves her way in, shuts the door, and turns to face me, her glassy eyes scanning my organized desk, my made bed, and the alphabetized books on the corner shelf.
“You’re always so organized,” she remarks, completely getting sidetracked, something she’s good at. “You definitely get that from your father.”
I don’t like when she compares me to my father, partly because I don’t like him and partly because she doesn’t like him, so the comparison isn’t a compliment.
“Mom, I don’t have to leave the house, do I?” I ask, chewing on my thumbnail.
She doesn’t make eye contact as she ambles over to the window and draws back the curtains to stare outside at the night sky. “Remember when your dad left, how sad I was?”
I start to answer, but she talks over me.
“I was really upset. He didn’t just break my heart; he smashed it to pieces.” She releases the curtain and twists around. “He bailed on you, too, you know.”
“Yeah, I know that.” I frown, unsure why she’s bringing the painful subject up. I hate thinking of my dad, how he bailed on me and destroyed my fun, loving mom.
“It’s okay, sweetie.” She crosses the room and pulls me in for a hug. She reeks of cigarette smoke, whiskey, and some sort of spice that makes my nostrils burn and my eyes water. “I wasn’t bringing that up to make you sad. I just wanted to let you know that I’d never leave you, no matter what. I promise I’ll be here for you no matter what happens. I won’t become your father.”
I circle my arms around her and hug her tightly as relief washes over me. She isn’t going to make me leave.
“But,” she starts, and my muscles wind into tight knots. “In order for me to keep my promise, you’re going to have to meet me halfway.”
“Okay … How do I do that?”
“By giving me some space when I need it.”
Tears burn my eyes as I slant my chin up to meet her eye to eye. “You mean leaving the house right now?”
She sighs as tears stream from my eyes. “It’s not a big deal. You can come home on Monday when Bill goes home.”
I wipe the tears from my cheeks. “But where should I go?”
She glances from the window to the door then back at me. “You can go hang out in the car. That could be fun. You could take your sleeping bag out there and pretend you’re camping.”
“I don’t like camping,” I say pointlessly. “And the last time I slept in the car, some guys started banging on the window and trying to get me to let them in.”
“Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.” She taps her finger against her bottom lip. “Maybe you could go spend the weekend at one of your friends’.” Excitement lights up in her eyes. “That would be fun, right?”
I glance at the alarm clock on my dresser. “I doubt any of my friends are even awake.”
She steps back, reaches into the pocket of her jeans, and retrieves her phone. “Well, you won’t know until you try, right?”
I warily eyeball the phone. “Their parents might get mad if I call this late.”