tilts her head to the side and nods. I smile at Lana as she catches up to us.
When I look back at Anna, I see her eyes widen. Then she visibly cringes. She’s not looking in Lana’s direction but behind me. Almost afraid to look, I turn and see the man I loved more than anything in my life, the man I thought I never wanted to see again.
“Adam?” I gasp, wishing like hell I was anywhere except here right now.
This is the first time I’ve said his name out loud since high school.
Even saying it breaks my heart a little.
“Bailey?” he whispers, looking at me like he is seeing a ghost. His green eyes widen and his jaw goes slack.
Only a few seconds pass, but it feels like years as we both take each other in.
He looks as happy to see me as I am him.
Which is a big fat not at all.
I don’t think his scowl can get any deeper, and his eyes are narrowed to slits. He looks like he hates me.
I don’t want to face him. I’m not ready; I don’t think I’ll ever be ready. I need a do-over for tonight. One where I never come out at all.
He’s the same . . . but completely different.
I don’t know how to explain my emotions right now, because they’re all rushing at me, pulling me in different directions.
Over the years, I’d planned out what I wanted to say to him if I ever saw him again, but now that I’m here, I have nothing. I want to yell; I want to rage; I want to cry. I want to ask him if he’s happy.
He’s even more beautiful than I remember, but now it’s in a deadly way.
Just looking into his eyes, I can tell he lives his life in murky shades of gray.
I notice a piercing in his lip that wasn’t there before, another in his eyebrow. They both suit him. I also see tattoos peeking out from under his vest. When he was mine, his skin was ink-free.
“I’m going to get your name, right here,” he says, pointing to his heart. “I’ll get it done when we’re married.”
I place my hand where the future tattoo will go. “I like that, Adam. Maybe I’ll get your name written on my ring finger, because, unlike a ring, that can never come off.”
I close my eyes and bring myself back to the present. I never expected or wanted to see Adam again, and now that I have, I need to try to calm my emotions, keep them locked away. The past has no place in the present, or in my future. Adam and I need to stay in the past, but I know it’s not as simple as that. He was my first and only love, and that’s not something one forgets. He also hurt me more than any other person has, more than any person could. I don’t know what to say right now. I want to cry. I want to scream. I want him to hold me.
Not surprisingly, I look down to see him zipping up his jeans, and a beautiful woman curling into his side.
Women always flocked to Adam. But once upon a time, this man was mine.
My everything.
And now? Now he’s just a stranger.
I look at the woman by his side, my emotions all over the place. “I see some things don’t change.”
The air thickens, uncomfortably so, but the two of us are locked in a silent battle, having conversations with our eyes.
“Should we go into—” Lana tries to defuse the tension, but Adam cuts her off.
“Anna, you and Lana go inside. Bailey and I need to talk.”
So much has already been said between us with no words used, I wonder what he could want to actually talk about. “What about me?” his woman snaps. “I just had your dick in my mouth and now you want to talk to this bitch?”
Bitch? I was the first woman to have Adam’s cock in her mouth! I cringe at my own thoughts. I’m seriously glad no one else can hear them.
Anna grabs Lana by her arm. “Let’s give them some privacy.”
I silently plead with them to stay, but they won’t even look in my direction. Yeah, no help there. I watch them disappear into the VIP room, then send my dirtiest look in Adam’s direction, but he’s not even looking at me. He’s trying to get rid of the woman who is still pasted against him.