Extracurricular Activities - By Maggie Barbieri Page 0,1

with three blue cheese–stuffed olives, followed by a dinner of two Klondike bars. I figured I had hit at least two of the major food groups with that selection; suffice it to say that I’m not making any major attempt at hanging on to my “girlish figure” as my mother used to call it.

With the vodka and prepackaged ice cream calling my name, I made my way home in record time and pulled into my driveway about fifteen minutes after I had left school. Dobbs Ferry is a pretty sleepy town but its proximity to St. Thomas makes it the perfect place for me to live. I pulled into my driveway and got out of the car, nodding to Trixie, the golden retriever who belonged to my neighbors and who stood sentry on the other side of the hedgerow that divided our property.

I guess you could call Trixie my third best friend because no matter what I do, what I say, or the kind of day I’ve had, she loves me unconditionally. I went over to the hedgerow and stuck my hand between the prickly branches to touch her. She responded by taking my whole hand in her mouth, licking it until it was soaked, and then giving me a nice “woof” as a send-off. She knows our time together is always brief and on the clandestine side because her owners and I don’t have the best relationship. So she takes what she can get and then moves on.

Although darkness had fallen and I was sorry that I hadn’t installed that motion-detecting light that Ray had been on my case about for the last year of our marriage, I did manage to make my way across the backyard without incident. I also made out a shape sitting on a lounge chair on the patio outside my back door. The moon glinted off a bald pate and I recognized my ex sprawled out on the lounge chair, his briefcase open beside him. Ray is bald by choice; he thinks it gives him “street cred” or something. I just miss seeing his head covered with a thick mop of gorgeous, wavy black hair.

“What are you doing?” I asked. “Grading papers in the dark?”

He must have been dozing because he sat up with a start, the papers on his lap spilling onto the patio. “I started grading papers when I got here. It was sunny then,” he said, his voice raspy and hoarse. He stood. “How are you?” He busied himself picking up the papers and stuffing them into his leather briefcase.

I approached him tentatively. Besides his habit of dropping by unannounced, which, as I said, really annoys me, there’s also the staying-way-too-long part. We didn’t spend a tremendous amount of time together when we were married; I couldn’t understand why we had to now. “Ray, I’ve got a ton of work to do tonight. I really don’t have time to visit.”

“I won’t stay long,” he promised. “Can I come in for a minute?”

I considered his request for a few minutes and stared at him. As long as a minute didn’t turn into two hours, it would be fine. “Okay. Fine.” I opened the back door and stood aside, letting him in. “What’s the matter with your voice?” I asked.

“I’ve got a cold,” he said. “I’ve had it for a few weeks. I can’t seem to shake it.”

I put my briefcase on the counter and offered him some tea. I immediately felt bad for being so annoyed with him; he was clearly under the weather and I wasn’t so heartless as to not have some sympathy for him. We sat at the kitchen table waiting for the water to boil and tried to think of something to talk about. Even though we had a not altogether happy history, we were never at a loss for something to talk about. That had all changed, however, when I had found out that he had slept with both our neighbor and one of my students. Even though he persisted with his drop-ins, I had been extremely frosty the last few times he had come by. He didn’t seem to notice.

“Max is getting married,” I said finally. I figured that would either be a good conversation starter or something that would bring it to a screeching halt. Max is my best friend and Ray’s archenemy. She hated him with a vengeance the likes of which I had never witnessed. His charm and good looks had no effect