Declan and I had spent lots of time in his room alone. His parents totally trusted us. Besides that, they expected us to spend the rest of our lives together, so they didn’t think a few stolen kisses in his bedroom were inappropriate. I honestly didn’t think Declan had any idea of what I had planned tonight.
When we got upstairs, all of that confidence I felt in the stairway about our future disappeared, as the nerves kicked in. As we stood beside the bed looking at each other, I was almost shaking. Then I mumbled to myself, “I don’t know if I can do this.”
Declan said, “Do what, sweetheart?” I then realized I had made that comment out loud. “You know I don’t expect us to do anything but sleep, Lor. I may steal a few kisses. I mean, I am a guy, but I would never ask you to do anything else, unless…? Do you want to do something else, Lor?”
I was so embarrassed I couldn’t even look up at him. I thought to myself come on Loralei...pull it together! This gorgeous, amazing guy loves you and you are going to spend forever with him. This is just one night...you can do this! My personal pep talk made me a little more confident. I slowly took a step toward Declan, placed my arms around his neck and pressed my lips to his. I was so scared…I was surprised I didn’t miss his mouth.
Our tongues were dancing and our hands were exploring each other. The kiss was amazing. It was like we both knew tonight was going to be different. We had made out every day, sometimes several times a day, for a year. This just felt different. The kiss seemed to last forever.
Before I knew it, I was unbuttoning his shirt and pushing it down his arms. When I finally got it off of him, I was pretty nervous. I threw it on the floor near the foot of the bed. Then, I grabbed the hem of my shirt and started to pull it over my head when Declan grabbed my hands and stopped me. I didn’t know what to think. I didn’t think I had done anything wrong. I was pretty new to this, but so was he. I couldn’t understand why he was stopping.
Declan looked down at where our hands were intertwined along the hem of my shirt. He lifted my left hand in his right and rubbed it over my jaw. He let go of my other hand and used his to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. Then, he released my hands and very slowly pulled my shirt over my head. I instinctively crossed my arms over my chest to cover my breasts when I realized they were barely covered by my white lacey bra.
Now, I had been nervous, but at this moment, I realized I was plum scared to death. This was really happening, and I had started it. What if I disappointed him? What if I didn’t do it right? What if he decided after we did it that he didn’t want to be with me anymore? All of these thoughts were completely freaking me out, but then I looked up. Declan was looking at me with this look. His eyes were sparkling and he was smiling. His look said everything I needed to hear. It told me that he loved me, it told me that this was going to perfect, and most importantly it told me that this was just the beginning of us.
All of my fear went away as I unhooked his belt buckle and started to unzip his jeans. He grabbed my hand to stop me, leaned down to my ear, and whispered, “Slow down, sweetheart. I’m not in any hurry.”
He placed his hands high on my hips and slid my skirt down to the floor. When it hit the floor, I kicked it, and it landed on top of our shirts at the foot of the bed. Without taking his eyes off of mine, he leaned in, reached behind me and unclasped my bra. Then he slid it down my arms and tossed it into our ever growing pile of clothes.
Declan had felt me up before, but we had never been like this. He may have felt my breasts before, but he had never really seen them up close and personal. And my breasts were really large...DD’s. I hated them, but judging by the look on his